literature

Ranger Smith Vs Officer Dribble

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CARTOON RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY!

Ranger SMith...

VS...

Officer Dribble!

BEGIN!


Ranger Smith (Verse One)
Yogi was bad enough, but now I meet Officer Hound
Who'd be better off working at the precinct pound!
I'm a tough park ranger, I'll bring Jellystone Heat
Onto Officer Cripple as he limps down his filthy beat!
I spent years in the army, you're still stuck bottom rung
The captain only trusts you to sweep an alley clean of dung!
I've got a pair of bad bears, but I'll take off my hat
To the petty officer who can't take on a gang of cats!

Officer Dibble (Verse One)
Oh I see how it is, Smith, I'm the one who's petty
But your biggest worry is two basket thieves in Jelly!
TC and his wily gang are busy pulling off big time scams
Yogi and Boo-Boo have you sweating bullets over jam heist jams!
I've stopped robbers and thieves, to crime I'm no stranger
You love to frisk park goers while they yell ranger danger!
I'm a whopper of a copper serving diss dishes right and proper
You may have been a soldier but like TC I'm the topper!

Ranger Smith (Verse Two)
Cool it down, Dibble, you're treading through a bad place
I think I'll call in backup to leave some egg on your face!
*Ranger Smith grabs his radio*
Yogi, go get a hold of Boo-Boo, I have some great news!
There's plenty of baskets here for you to choose!

Officer Dibble (Verse Two)
So that's the unkempt park path we're walking down?
Alright, wiseguy, I have some friends I'm calling in from town!
*Officer Dibble dials his telephone*
TC, grab the gang and scramble down here quick!
A movie director's here for casting and you're his pick!

*Yogi, Boo-Boo, TC and his gang all arrive*

Yogi: Excuse me, sir, we are here for the pic-a-nic basket special, sir!
Smith: You can have all the baskets you want after you deal with this cur!

TC: We are present and accounted for, Officer Dribble, and ready for casting call!
Dibble: I'll call the station and haul you in if you can't outwit them all!

*Yogi and Boo-Boo stare down TC and his gang*

Yogi and Boo-Boo Bear
Yogi: Hey, Boo-Boo, what's purple, yellow, and smells like cheese?
Boo-Boo: Not a peanut butter and jam sandwich, it's TC the alleycat sleeze!
Yogi: I'm on the Ball and my Brain's ready to give you a Spook!
Boo-Boo: We'll let loose our Fancy rhymes that hit you like a Choo-Choo!
Yogi: Boo-Boo and I are equal partners, so we both see the real raw deal!
Boo-Boo: A group of dimwitted felines begging Top Cat for their next meal!
Yogi: If the Benny Hill bunch was smarter they'd kick TC out on his tooshie!
Boo-Boo: I guess it's true, Yogi, we're both smarter than the average p****!

Top Cat and the Gang
Top Cat
Well isn't this a quite a predicament we're in boys?
Go ahead and chew these bears up like a couple of cat toys!

Benny: TC, you wanna hear a joke that's kind of funny?
Brain: Duh, Yogi and Boo-Boo are a couple of dummies!
Choo-Choo: Gee, Brain, that's not really a good punchline...
Spook: Like, don't worry man, Fancy's got him this time!
Fancy-Fancy: Wait, I do? I was busy thinking about this hot dime-

Top Cat
Alright, boys, that's enough, I'll do it myself I suppose
I know I can handle two double-stuffed teddies ruled by their nose!
It's like the saying goes, Yogi, with the thorns on the rose
I look like a catch but this Tippity Top Cat stings with his prose!
Boo-Boo knows to stay well behaved around his betters
So let him teach you a lesson before gobbling a ham and cheddar!
I don't see a pair of partners, I see a pair of bare beggars
So obey the park signs before I send Animal control some letters!

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

CARTOON RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY!
My friend is going old-school with Hanna-Barbera's authority figures against meddling trouble makers. Ranger SMith from Yogi Bear facing off Officer Dribble from Top Cat

Both Yogi Bear and Top Cap belongs to Hanna-Barbera
© 2016 - 2024 PLCTheCd
Comments3
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Gotapenname's avatar
This is the most fun thing . I love it. I think it's a  tie for sure though :)